Long Live the Longevity Party? Nov11

Long Live the Longev...

Our major political parties are constantly arguing over things like climate change, immigration and the economy. Blah, blah, blah. I don’t care much about any of those things. They don’t have a direct or immediate effect on my life. I had lost all interest in politics until I discovered a new...

The Era of Clickitivism Oct29

The Era of Clickitiv...

Have you ever wanted to fight the system? Be part of the revolution that makes real change possible? Transform the world into a better place? We all do, don’t we? However, that kind of change usually involves hard work, money, and, most importantly, risk. Who has time to challenge the man...

The Sky is Falling? Dec24

The Sky is Falling?

Only God knows when the human race will cease to exist, but that has not stopped doomsday theorists from trying to predict the end of planet earth as we know it. The first end of the world prognosticator was Chicken Little, a.k.a Chicken Licken, who mistakenly believed that the sky was...

You’ve Been on Social Media Too Much When… Sep03

You’ve Been on Socia...

Are you addicted to Facebook or Twitter? Or is it something you can control? Many people lose control after that first post. Some accept it, some are in denial. Which one are you? See if you show any of the following traits and find out: 1.- You read an email, you like it, and you want to up...

How to Spot Fake Posts on Facebook Jun25

How to Spot Fake Pos...

What Facebook lacks in privacy, it more than makes up for it with content. Aside from your friends’ posts about how they are having a great time with two friends at a restaurant and pictures of their babies, the other type of posts you’ll see most commonly are news about events...

Pfizer Merges with Allergan Jun04

Pfizer Merges with A...

Viagra maker, Pfizer, is merging with Irish pharma giant Allergan, maker of Botox. The result will be the world’s largest… um… er… pharmaceutical. This is a marriage straight from petri dish heaven, two companies cashing in on our desire to turn back the clock. Or...

Conspiracy Exposed!

We bet you had no idea that lost socks are part of a vast international conspiracy.  Well watch and...

The Quest to be No. 1 Mar27

The Quest to be No. ...

In early December my wife suggested that we attend the World’s Largest Ugly Sweater Party in St. Louis. The organizers’ hope was that more than 1,175 ugly sweater wearers would attend so that we would break the world record. I said ok as it would be a good opportunity for me to wear the...

Politically Correct Joke Checklist Jan10

Politically Correct Joke Checklist

Great comedians don’t just focus on being funny. They know that in order to succeed, they need to take into account people’s feelings above everything else. Even if you are not a professional comedian, it’s necessary to purge any joke, even those used in casual conversation from any material that might be considered offensive. The purpose of this checklist is to make sure that any joke that you tell is completely safe to use and doesn’t offend anyone, intentionally or unintentionally. Please ask your friends to be patient with you while you go through this checklist after you announce that you have a joke for them. Going through the...

‘Merican Harry Potter Nov08

‘Merican Harry...

If you are a Harry Potter fan, you must have heard about J. K. Rowling’s upcoming prequel, which will feature the adventures in ‘Murica of young not-yet-killed Sirius Black and James Potter. J.K. Rowling has created a new American term for muggle in the story: no-maj. Many people...

Making India Proud Oct12

Making India Proud

“What a great day for India!” exclaimed my friend. Having just glanced through the front page of the printed newspaper, with its usual dose of an Opposition walkout in Parliament, a Central Minister being questioned for undue favours to a tainted businessperson, rapes, stampede deaths...

Get the Puck Outta Here Sep20

Get the Puck Outta H...

I don’t understand the outcry over the number of Mexicans entering our country. I feel that, for the most part, America needs them. It’s the Canadians that are swarming across our border that bother me. That’s why I was thrilled to hear Republican presidential candidate Scott Walker state...

It’s Raining Mixed Metaphors Aug22

It’s Raining Mixed Metaphors

(Editor’s note: We liked the original title “It’s Raining Mixed Metaphors Right and Left and Other Verbal Buffoonery in the News.” Unfortunately, it was too long for our format.) I knit. I knit a lot. I do this because I find that it is impossible to eat potato chips if my hands are busy with yarn. This is the only diet regimen that works. And I have tried them all. As I knit, I entertain myself by bouncing around among the numerous all-news television networks. (This constant and expert handling of the remote comprises my daily exercise routine.) During the 2012 presidential campaign season, I started noticing an...

My Vid is Bad/Good

    It started with a book called Talking2Trees. I wrote this biographical book over many years, pulling stories from my past that all had a common theme: Something unlikely happened. I mean something very unlikely really happened. I thought it might be interesting to record myself reading one of the stories, so I sat in front of the computer and did a pretty lame job of it. But did I stop there? Oh no. I figured that it might be 20% cooler if I used sound effects. I put an ad on Craigslist for a guy who could make good vocal sound effects and got one response: the guy at the beginning of the vid, so I hired him sight unseen. I...

New Words on Social Media

New Words You Wouldn’t Understand If You Didn’t Waste Time on Social Media I recently managed to find a way to curb my addiction to Civilization and stop wasting time playing it. Now I waste as much time on social media. During this, shall we call, “experiment,” I have improved my vocabulary with a new lexicon. Here are ten new words that I have learned that I wouldn’t have known otherwise. Note: With two exceptions, I got the meaning from these words from their context, so I might be wrong about them. 1. Waifu. An female anime character that you find attractive and that you jokingly say are in love with. It comes from the...